I see you, mama! You are at the end of the day and there it is: Guilt. I know because I feel it too.
Despite the loads of laundry, floors that have been swept and mopped, full bellies, an empty kitchen sink and peacefully sleeping babies…it still doesn’t feel like enough.
If we’re productive around the house then we didn’t spend enough time with the kids. If we’re spending the whole day making memories then we’re ignoring the daily chores and all of a sudden we feel behind and can’t believe we are living in such a pig-sty.
It’s a constant cycle of guilt and we need to let it go, mamas! This is such a struggle for me, but guess what? When we’re doing all the loads of laundry and keeping up the house, we are loving our families well. And when we’re spending the day doing something fun and ignoring the house for awhile, we are also loving them well. When you are working hard to provide for your family, you are loving well! When you pick up fast food because work ran late, you are loving them well. When you are snuggling on the couch at the end of the day instead of doing something “more productive” around the house, you are loving so well.
Let it go, mamas! Let’s not let the guilt get us down. More often than not, this is from the enemy. He wants us to feel defeated and keep us feeling this way so that we become easily irritated and impatient with our kids. When we start to feel the mom guilt set in, let’s take it to God. Let’s ask Him if there’s something that has taken root in our lives that shouldn’t be there and as a result is causing this feeling of guilt. If there’s not and you are simply feeling less than because you didn’t have time to cook a three course meal while the toddler was whining and reaching up for you then let’s let it go! Let’s rise above the guilt so we’re not living and operating from this space.
Lord, I thank you for your grace and that your mercies are new each morning. It feels like I’m constantly wrestling with mom guilt and I know it’s not from you. Thank you, God, for freeing us from these types of feelings. Help us to discern what we are hearing. Lord, if it’s from you, show us how we can mirror you in our motherhood. If the feeling of guilt comes from the enemy, help us to call it out and speak your name over our lives and remember that we are loved by you, God, and that guilt doesn’t have to define us. We are free when we are living in you. Thank you, Jesus.
Another reminder of the brevity of the moments and the hours that evaporate while we tread water to stay afloat. I remember frequently laying my weary head as a young mom on a pillow…finally, collapsing…and checking myself: “what did I do today that counted for Eternity?” Silence. Tears. I am not certain if we”ll ever really know or feel that peace of satisfaction as we trudge through the routine of life. In this “empty nest” season (I don’t even know what that empty looks like because my nest is far from empty or what I imagined to be a restful season of inactivity) the tears have returned as the brevity of threescore and ten years seem to be jet propelled—they arrived much faster seemingly than the infancy-toddler -teenage demanding years passed of parenthood. Trust me. Your home, as my mom’s goal, she shared with me was printed on a wooden plaque that was hanging in our kitchen. It read: “Our home is clean enough to be healthy and dirty enough to be happy.” Buzz Word: BALANCE. And as Chuck Swindoll once said, “we only achieve it on the way from one extreme to the next.” (Like the swing of a pendulum) “This is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it.” May those sweet girls see your gladness not the shined granite, finger print removed sliding glass door, or the detailed vacuum lines of the carpet. That’s all that will remain in their memories…and they will be glad! Love you Kristin!